Twilight

Yes, I know. EVERYONE and their grandmother's dead grandmother is talking about it. It's like "the new Harry Potter" and "every Hot Topic customer's wet dream." It IS TEH Twilight.

I absolutely BEYOND LOATHE when people pick sides for the sake of picking sides. And that's what, oh, 60, 70% of the people I know have done. Many (most) of the folks I know have not read any of the books. And many (most) of the people I know therefore hate it. Why? Because it's popular.

God forbid I become really popular. There'll be a "Let's kill Sara" group on Facebook the day after the internet shrine is constructed in my honor.

I mean, seriously? Have you even seen a book cover for any of the novels? You're going to hate on it because it has a big following? Wow. Just, wow.

Typical conversation between myself and Twilight Hater A:

"Hmm Hmm Hmmm. *see's Twlight trailer on internets* Ooh!! Can't wait!!"

"*eyeroll so loud and obnoxious it actually gets my attention*"

"*blank stare* [Internal dialogue "God. Another one. Whatever, bring it."]"

"You read ''''''''Twilight'''''''''''? (< 700 sarcastic finger quotes)"

"yeah"

"OMFG WHAT THE HELL SO STUPID *vomit*"

"*blank stare*"

"BLARH BLARH LIKE SERIOUSLY LET ME GET THIS STRAIGHT THIS IS HOW THE STORY GOES 'HEY I'M BELLA MY LIFE SUCKS WAGGGH' ' HEY I'M EDWARD I'M A VAMPIRE RAWR' 'HEY OMG I LOVE YOU LAAAA' 'LET'S DO IT' 'MAKE ME A VAMPIRE' THE END! *eyebrow wiggle*......ha."

"*.......* .... *..blank stare*"

"Yeah, like so I've heard it's the single worst piece of literature ever written. Ever."

"*lightbulb*....wait, so, you've never actually read Twilight?"

"Well, no-"

"*chuckle*"

"But I-"

"*continues living life*"

I mean, really? At least read the book first. Then you can spill your stored up word vomit all over my t-shirt while I'm trying to do more productive things. Until then, SHUT THE FUCK UP.

OH MY GOD. I MEAN IT. SHUT. THE. FUCK. UP.